change my life; i know you can

today i feel: off
today i'm hearing: jesus christ superstar -- london revival cast
today i'm thinking: something is wrong. i just don't know what.

The London revival cast is not nearly as badass as the original West End cast. It's a suitable substitute, but I very well may have to kill Marion for snagging my Perfectly Legal Copy. Even if New!Judas is a sex machine.

I bombed my German test. And maybe it was just that or maybe it was just that I've been really wigged out in recent memory, or maybe something else. But I was walking back to the room after class and I got this coldness in my stomach, this pain and worry wrapping around my gut. And I knew--I knew--that something was wrong. Someone was in serious danger or upset or something. And I wasn't sure who it was, but I had a couple of ideas. And I called my mum to make sure everything was all-right and she wasn't at her desk. Possible doom sign #1. And I sent a text to Tony to make sure he was okay and I haven't heard back from him yet. Possible doom sign #2, though this is less doomy than the first; he's supposed to be working right now. And I got back to my room and Chelsea was asleep (asleep, not dead; I checked) and that was good because that was my third option. And the feeling still hasn't gone away and I still haven't heard from Mum or Tony and I don't know what's going on. But I'm worried. And I hate worrying.

Believe me or not, I was doing really well for a couple of days. Pornstar!Joe even noticed. I believe his precise phrase was, 'She's back'. I was really happy and helpful and not freaking out about things much at all. Well, still freaking out but not like I have been. And now it's gone. Which is really, really frustrating.

I'm going to write an essay about fashion and young people. Because I know so much about that.