then why is the night so long?

today i feel: pretty crappy
today i'm hearing: m ward on random
today i'm thinking: this pent-up agression stuff really needs to stop

I'm skipping my tour this afternoon. I am not feeling peppy. I am not in the right state of mind to tell people they should come to this university. I will probably drop 'fuck' about a million times and traumatise the parents. This would likely be a bad idea.

I'm skipping my scholarship interview today. I am not an excellent example of SIUC's academia today. I don't want to go to graduate school this week. I don't want to discuss my future. I don't want to really think about my future today. I don't want to think any further than my hopeful hangover Sunday morning. Thankyaverymuchbetch.

Da sent me a Passover card; just got in the mail today. It made me more kinds of happy than I could possibly describe. I miss my da. I miss him a lot.

Kelsey is a wonderful, amazing person and I like her a whole bunch. Reason? Well, firstly she is just generally awesome and I probably have a crush on her. But secondly, she loaned me a copy of Alice. And that is exactly what I'm going to immerse myself in this afternoon, at least until Deb calls and demands my presence.

Clarky rung up Bozarth while we were lunching. The conversation was amusing, what bits of it I heard. I kind of miss that kid. I should probably go rape him sometime or something. Yeah. That would be a good idea. Oh, Bozarth. How cute you are in assuming your own safety. It's kind of adorable. I'm rambling.

Most everyone I know is going home this weekend. Which is cool for them. I'll be in rehearsal tomorrow morning and ransacking das Haus des Tonys Saturday night (whether he likes it or not mwaha), so I should be relatively distracted. Don't know what I'm doing Sunday. I need to call my folks (hey, they've got their religion too, I guess), which will likely result in me having to talk to my grandparents. Oy vay. No, Grandpa, I don't love Jesus. No, Grandma, I don't want to learn how to set a beautiful table. I'm sorry I fail at being a woman. I've come to terms with it, though it was hard. Das ist das Leben. Es tut mir leid.

I'm really hoping that my stomach is acting up because I'm sad and not because I'm sick. Because I kind of need to be Little Sally and Josephine Strong this weekend. And I can't do that when I'm vomitting profusely. Just doesn't work.

Happy Holiday to all who are celebrating whatever it is you're celebrating. Have a good weekend. Stay warm and safe. Love, me.