adulthood sucks

mood: irate
music: you're older than you've ever been -- they might be giants
CPCetc: head. wall. bang.

Okay. Please explain this to me, someone: how is it that someone can be able to make a significant life change while still being very young, very naïve and very, very broke without any assistance whatsoever? Hm? Riddle me this.

Of course, this is related to something. And that something is...
MY SPASTIC MOTHER!!!

Now, let me just state for the record that I am very aware of the fact that I leave town in a week. In fact, there are very few things I am more aware of (Paige leaving on Sunday, personal relationship issues, the terrifying prospect of not seeing friends/lovers/cats/etc, the massive headache I have been acquiring for the past three days). Thusly, it really isn't necessary to tell me every five minutes that I need to get my act together because, ha ha, I AM.

Chowever.

My parents are doing almost nothing to help me out with this. They've gotten me cleaning supplies. Hurray, I can wipe my own ass. They've stolen twenty-year-old sheets from my aunt. We've gotten a microwave and a television.

...

...

...Yep. That's it. I have no clothes. I have no school supplies. I have no way to care for my body or my mind. But I can clean the toilet, goddamnit!

And this is INFURIATING! Why, you ask? I'll tell you why. My parents have all-ready sent a kid to college. Now, Justin's college experience was spastic and unpleasant. He didn't get to go where he wanted to go. He didn't go to class (don't lie, Justin, I'm right). He left after a year. My parents forked out a hefty sum of money for him on tuition alone. On top of that, they made certain he had brand new sheets, plenty of materials to enhance his studies, decent clothes, decent hygenic equipment and many of the perks college students seem to enjoy (free laundry on occassion, hangars, that sort of thing).

Now let's compare that with my theoretical college experience.

1. They don't have to pay for my tuition or boarding.
2. The college I'm attending was going to be cheaper anyway.
3. I began looking at colleges in my sophomore year of high school.
4. I have been nothing if not specific about my college-going needs.
5. I've managed to obtain a reasonable amount of scholarship for books.

So. Why is it that I'm getting such different treatment? Aren't we supposed to believe in equal opportunity in this house? Is this all set in some Freudian need for me to fail and come crawling back to Mummy-dearest?

It's going to be one helluva long week.