she has to discipline her body

mood: ill
music: and all that jazz -- chicago (why...?)
CPCetc: ewwww... cold eucalyptus.

I think I have all my homework done. It's 21.20. Wow. Well, except for my EnviSci write-out thingies, but I don't have a book. So I'll do those at one and stick them in his mailbox. I'm being a good student! Wtf??

I feel like watching Eternal Sunshine. Maybe I'll go do that. I don't know. I feel like I should go to bed early, but I know that's not really going to happen. It should, though. Seeing how I played hooky today and all. And kind of feel like poop.

I was being an emo kid last night--mostly because I wasn't ready to sleep--and I started looking through old journal entries. And it was really interesting to see the progression of things in my life. I'm really bad about keeping up journals (note the last update of this blog), but you can still see it in some cases. And a lot of things I've been thinking about recently became a lot clearer. And I felt better emotionally. I felt loads better. Does that make me a bad person? Does it make me a bad person to let go of things that should be hard to let go of? Does it make me a bad person to give up?

I've been talking to my mum a lot lately, mostly to compensate for the fact that I haven't been. And she's told me that some things are the way they are and that's the way they'll always be. Like the sky being blue and my brother being crazy and Sammy eating shoes and stuff. Some things you have to accept because changing them is too hard. I know, I know, there's a huge difference between a dog's kleptomania and the colour of the sky, but it's the basic idea. You have to accept things that are difficult. You make mistakes, people die, bad things happen; they're all a part of life. How could you grow without them? How could you know when you're happy if you're never sad?

Wow. Random introspective monologue. Guess I am tired.