stream-of-sub-consciousness

mood: mrph
music: library at ten
CPCetc: ow. life.

An update, because Marion guilted me into it. Ahem.

My belly hurts. And I don't know why.

I've decided that no one is a truly bad person. You can still be a good person and own slaves. You can still be a good person and hate Jews or fags or liberals. It's not that you're an imbodiment of pure evil, you just have a difference of opinions. It's like my da says. 'Good people can do bad things.' I think the issue arises when someone doesn't take into account the fact that it was a different time and place or a person was raised in a different manner or something to that extent. We have to look at extenuating circumstances and take those into account. Hitler wasn't always a cruel person. There was a reason for it. There's a reason for everything.

Sometimes I wonder if there ever really was a person in me like the person I am now. I wonder if I had a personality once and if that's the personality I have now or was it just stitched together from too many experiences and changes and books. I'm not really sure I feel all that different from freshman year, or primary for that matter. I'm still scared and uncertain and completely lost, just like everyone else. But you have to wonder if you get that way from birth or from all the broken bones and scars on your body. It's interesting to think about at least.

John-John fixed my car radio. I could've kissed him for it. I did, but on the cheek. As he is gay. And I am taken. Issues...

I want to write something. Really write something. Not just the crap I've been turning out recently. Maybe I should get back to poetry. That might be fun. I miss poetry. It makes me feel...I don't know. Clean? Well thought-out at least. Poetry's like that, though.

This shouldn't be here. This should be in my notebook where it fits in. Oh well.