*bangs head repeatedly on keyboard*

mood: feeling like shite
music: 'seven nation army' blaring in my head
CPCetc: i'm so hardcore! *cutcutcut*

This post contains entirely self-depricating, stupid angst. Please skip. For the love of God.

I missed the yankball game last night.

During the six years I've known Corpus, I've never missed a performance. I've never voluntarily missed a rehearsal. I skipped class once during tech week of Into the Woods in a valiant attempt to keep my--and Paige's--sanity. But that hardly counts. I've been sick as a dog, coughing so hard I taste blood in the back of my throat and I've still gone to ever basketball game, dinner party, Metcalf rally, competition and school concert she's thrown at me. So the one time she gives us a lecture about being at a performance, how is it that I manage to FORGET THE FECKIN' YANKBALL GAME?

Dr Armstrong would kill me. Which'll be a right spot better than what Corpus is going to pull out, I'll warrant.

Fuck. I don't miss performances! I don't! Especially not vocal performances! It just...it doesn't happen! What the hell is wrong with me?? I was doing so well yesterday. I did all my homework, worked on Orchescheiβ with Christie, I helped Pat, I was being a good kid! I stayed home all night, not even thinking of running off! And now Mum and Da think I was partying or sommat and Corpus is going to slaughter me and-- FUCK! I don't even have a reason to forget! And forgetting Madrigals??? Mads was the one thing that was keeping me from a complete mental breakdown this week! It was the one thing I was perfectly happy about that I'd committed to! Jesus Christ, Kiri! What the Hell???

If my memory's so fucking good, then why do I forget so damn much?